Rainy days

Its pouring in Toronto and everything feels a little glum. Mark and Ronan said I should've stayed at home in bed today and I really should've listened. I'm over tired and cranky and work sucks. And I'm bummed out that I had to call my Gillibeans and tell her I couldn't come to her wedding. :( Sorry Gillian and Jonathan, I feel like a crappy friend for not being there.

And to top it all off, I just found out that Bula, the lovely lady who cleans our office once a fortnight and who was three weeks behind me in her pregnancy, lost her baby last week. I feel awful. She even apologised to me because we'd made jokey plans that we were going to be pregnancy buddies and get fat together and now we won't. I feel awful for still being pregnant when she's not, for even looking pregnant right now, for mentioning my pregnancy at all. And of course its freaked me right out, and every little sensation I get in my belly makes me worry that Bob will decide he's had enough of me and disappear.

I've got my first appointment with Doctor Cherry tomorrow morning so I will hopefully have all my fears wiped clean.

I think I'm going to go to bed early tonight because I'm knackered. What with the tiredness and the hormone overdrive I think I'll either punch the next person I see or sob all over them...

On another note, here is a fuzy self-portrait of me and Bob looking a little larger than the last time you saw us. And yes, that's my very first maternity top I'm wearing. The only thing in my wardrobe that's been remotely comfy this week.

Sorry to be such a Debbie Downer, but I'll try to be more upbeat after my appointment tomorrow. Its the hormones, I can't help it!